Seasons & episodes

Embarrassed before a country club lunch, Tom wants Mary to keep up with the Joneses by shopping for chic dresses at Tufts and Tweeds. Martha fears God will punish Cathy for selling her babies. Garth discovers Little Garth's secret and tells Pat he'll shape her into a good wife it literally kills them. Merle advises Loretta to get rid of Jody and proposes she sing at his election rally.

Mary and Dr. Medwick rap about rape and upward mobility. Loretta kisses Jody and tells him goodbye forever. About to jump from the bridge, Charlie hears Loretta's love song to him on the radio and decides to go home. Joe Sutonni wants to give Charlie a physical and psychological makeover. Merle goes on live television and offers voters two minutes of silence to look into his eyes and see the best man for mayor.

Garth bungles Merle's press conference, angering him, but Merle turns it around with an engagement announcement. Wanda requests a private celebration, but Merle insists on abstinence until their wedding night. Merle's rejection prompts Wanda to visit Annie, who claims she isn't a threat to the marriage. Wanda and Annie realize they both see people as numbers. Mary phones Italy to tell Gore Vidal that she can't continue co-writing their book because she' preoccupied with all the drama in Fernwood. Merle eavesdrops on the conversation and professes to Mary that he sees something in her that Tom doesn't. Mary invites Merle into her kitchen for a quiet cup of tea.

Pat introduces Mary to Garth Phillip Gimble, Jr., who doesn't like to be called "Little Garth". During Merle's election night party, Garth threatens Pat, but she swears she'll expose him as a wife beater if he lays a hand on her. Mary's new dress embarrasses Tom at the party. Tom refuses Cathy's request to help Martha with her mortgage payment. Merle fires Garth for not supporting his two minutes of silence trick on TV. Mary worries when Tom reveals he invested a large sum of money in lake property.

Mary suggests that an upset Loretta seek advice from Bob Gilroy, the plant psychologist. Gilroy makes a house call to the Haggers home, but Loretta's tale of Charlie's accident in the motel room repulses him. Tom finds Garth drowning his sorrows at the Capri and attempts to comfort him. Later, Tom is shocked to find Martha at the lounge dressed as a hooker. Joe Sutonni and an exasperated store clerk give Charlie a makeover.

Mary appeals to Cathy not to sell her baby, and although the idea is sound financially, Cathy feels shame. Suspecting that Big Honey is using the CB to run Fernwood's prostitution ring, Detective Johnson arranges for Martha to meet her at the Bide-a-Wee Motel, where she uses the alias Mrs. McQueen. Mary insists on accompanying Martha and they arrive dressed as hookers. When Mrs. McQueen fails to answer her phone, Mrs. Delorean gives Martha and Mary applications to complete. Mary and Martha are unnerved by the presence of a leering john and a cop.

Garth escalates his abuse of Pat. Annie informs Merle that her gift to Wanda is to never be intimate with him again. Merle flirts with Big Honey on Annie's CB. While Charlie phones Loretta to say he's returning to her, Joe Sutonni is gunned down in a mob hit. Everyone congregates in the Hartman living room for Merle and Wanda's wedding, but where is the groom?

Merle and Wanda marry with Mary's unusual ceremonial vows. Detective Johnson arranges for Tom to pose as a john and help him crack the prostitution ring by exposing Big Honey. On his wedding night, Merle makes a date with Big Honey over the C.B. and lies to Wanda that he has to go out to keep a campaign promise. A dejected Wanda seeks companionship from Annie, and the two admit they're attracted to one another.

Merle arrives at the mortuary where Big Honey's partner Mac is reluctant to let him see her. Merle talks his way into the slumber room and is stunned to learn the identity of Big Honey. Detective Johnson, Mary, and Tom raid the mortuary just as Merle and Big Honey finish 45 minutes of passion. When Harold Clemens arrives on the scene for a news story, Merle is forced to reveal the mastermind behind the prostitution ring. At the police station, Tom has questions for the new mayor who once again proves he can talk himself out of any situation.

Detective Johnson's shocking confession about his past prompts Martha to end their courtship. Garth and Pat have yet another fight, this time over his accusation that she doesn't support his career. Mary's suggestion that Tom is spending too much money angers him. Heather and Little Garth's discussion of teen sex is interrupted by a phone call from a man who claims to be George Shumway and says he's coming home.

Financially strapped Tom visits the plant to ask Crimins if he has any unpaid money due him. Christine mimics Cathy's movements to appear pregnant. Mary's kitchen is filled with women who received a mysterious questionnaire from the National Center of Sexual Activities. Pat's elation over Garth's Christmas presents fades when he gives her a mop and bucket and Little Garth a tinkle sheet for his bed. Brian and Christine scheme to have Cathy's natural childbirth at Mary's house instead of Fernwood Receiving.

Guests fill Mary's kitchen on Christmas Day, including the Jeeters, Gimbles, Annie, and Loretta who arrives late with one Jimmy Joe's bicentennial Christmas trees. Mary leads the group with a prayer of thanks, a rendition of Silent Night, and asks everyone to sing Happy Birthday to the baby Jesus. Martha opens the kitchen door to find a chanting George dressed like a religious cult member. Loretta performs for a packed house at the Capri lounge and receives her best Christmas present ever when Charlie arrives and gets a rise out of the occasion.

Charlie and Loretta express their passion in the car on the side of a public road. Heather hands over another sex questionnaire that Mary had hidden in a box of Froot Loops, and Mary learns the questionnaire was sent by Mae Olinski. Pat's tenderness toward Garth ends in her being beaten by a plastic snowman. Sikanda, another Boga Zidi cult member, joins George in the Shumway home which they raid. Tom's loan is refused, and Mary shows him a bounced check.

Mary refers Wanda to Bob Gilroy when Wanda begins lisping. Gilroy reacts with disgust when Wanda confesses she spent her wedding night at Annie's trailer, but Wanda's cured when she realizes Gilroy is more messed up than she is. Reverend Standfast refers Martha to a deprogrammer to help George escape the Boga Zidi cult. A desperate Tom turns to Merle for a loan, but Merle's money is tied up in a new Seville. Charlie and Loretta make up for lost time, and their luck appears to be changing when they learn that Joe Sutonni paid for Loretta to have an album recording session in Dayton.

Mr. Donally, Tom's boss at the RV dealership, warns Tom that his aggressive approach and low sales have put him danger of being fired. Christine's snobbish father mistreats Cathy during a visit to the Addams house. Tom receives a phone call from Mae Olinski, who says she's coming back to Fernwood next week. Mary and Tom's discussion of the sex survey turns ugly when Mary confesses that she isn't sure she's ever achieved the ultimate pleasure while making love with Tom.

Charlie and Loretta grab the dictionary when Fernwood's new skywriter writes the word "foreplay" in the sky. Montgomery Monk arrives at the Shumway home to begin George's deprogramming. Mary gives Pat a copy of Ms magazine's cover story of battered wives and suggests she give Garth a taste of his own medicine. Later, while fighting with Garth about Mary's visit, Pat slaps him. Before boarding her bus to Dayton for the recording session, Loretta is harassed by photographer Jake Walters. When another drunken passenger intervenes, a fight breaks out, Loretta is hit on the head, and she awakens with amnesia.

In Dayton, Jake stops by Lou's diner where amnesiac Loretta is pegged as a slut. Loretta, calling herself Lulu, is befriended by owner Lou and regular customer Mac Slattery. Wanda tells Mary that she's found a way to achieve ultimate satisfaction and knows she can teach it to any man. Little Garth brings Pat to Mary's kitchen after Garth turns the hose on her, destroys her clothes, and locks her out of the house. Montgomery Monk attempts to restore George back his crabby old self. Mary hosts a disastrous New Year's Eve Party where Annie announces she's leaving Fernwood, and a drunken Tom reveals he's been fired.

Mary and Pat cut up Tom's credit cards. Montgomery Monk uses a Ho-Ho to reprogram George. Merle feels that Wanda is spending more time on public life than married life. Garth admits to Charlie that his father was a wife beater. In her Lulu personality at Lou's diner, Loretta flirts with Mac and doesn't recognize a snapshot of Charlie.

Monk reaches a breakthrough with reprogramming George. Sikanda teaches Martha the Boga Zidi way. Mae Olinski visits Tom and Mary and reveals that she's behind the sexy skywriting over Fernwood. Christine experiences sympathy pains for Cathy. Garth and Tom discuss forgiving husbands. Pat confesses to Mary that she fantasizes killing Garth.

Mae informs Mary that she's writing a book about sexual satisfaction using the women of Fernwood for her research. The Shumways dish the family dirt to a recovered George. Tom rejects Mary's suggestion that he get his old assembly job back. Mary visits Brian and says she'll resort to blackmail to ensure Tom's return to the plant. Loretta as Lulu accepts Lou's offer to be his new waitress in the diner.

Charlie and Mary visit a recovered George who's distressed over all the crazy complications that ensued while he was brainwashed. A police officer gives Martha notice to vacate the Shumway house which is in foreclosure. Mary and Cathy argue grammar. Brian and Christine visit the scene of their baby's upcoming birth. Heather and Little Garth talk about making out.

Tom is disheartened when Jess, the manager of the Capri Lounge, won't hire him as the daytime bartender because he's over-qualified. Mary reminds Brian that she'll blackmail him if she has to, so Brian arranges an interview for Tom at the plant. Mae asks Wanda to endorse her sexual research in Fernwood. Charlie becomes frantic when he learns that Loretta didn't show up at her hotel in Dayton. Garth persuades Pat to return home. While Lt. Trask questions Mary about Loretta's disappearance, Cathy and Christine arrive and announce they're in labor.

Martha's new pet sitting service terrifies George after he finds a monkey and a tarantula in his kitchen. Complications arise when lawyer Darcy Pinker demands Cathy sign a contract before giving birth, and Dr. Fermin phones to say he can't attend the delivery. Tom convinces Charlie to seek help from Merle to find Loretta. Loretta sweet talks money out of Lou then flirts with Mac. A state trooper stops by the diner looking for Loretta, but Lou claims he hasn't seen her.

Merle vetoes Charlie and Tom's request that he intercede in the police search for Loretta. The experience of natural childbirth becomes more intense for Cathy and Christine. Merle meets Mae but rejects her research theory that the "normal way" leaves women in the cold. After Merle dismisses them, Wanda offers to help Mae's cause by arranging a meeting with reporter Harold Clemens. Darcy finally gets the signature he wants on the Addams contract. Tom and Mary wonder if they were once happy before. A birth and a death occur simultaneously in Mary's kitchen.