Seasons & episodes

Dave talks about a Steak House Onion Machine, while Michael J. Fox promotes his sitcom ""Spin City.""

Dave shows a (bogus) ad for ESPN2's ""Xtreme Presidental Perjury,"" while J.Lo promotes ""Antz.""

A gag promo for the TV series ""Biffy, The Umpire Layer"" is declared the worst joke ever seen on the show; an ""Audience Vote"" determines Rip Taylor as tonight's guest instead of an absentee Cindy Crawford; Kevin James does some stand-up to promote ""The King of Queens.""

Dave makes fun of Inky's summer camp outfit. Later, Howard Stern plays with his gut and strips to his underwear in order to show off his legs.

A fawn walks onstage during CBS Mailbag; comedian Jon Stewart promotes ""The Daily Show.""

Musical guests Elvis Costello and Burt Bacharach perform ""I Just Don't Know What To Do With Myself."" Also, ""newly elected chancellor of Germany Gerhardt Schroeder"" sits in with the band ""all night long"" on alto sax.

Dave lets Inky go on a ""gum break;"" George Clarke is introduced as operator of the Late Show hedge fund; Biff demands more scandals involving President Clinton; Chris Tucker promotes Rush Hour.

Warren fills in for Paul (out for Yom Kippur); Kelsey Grammer brings out his dog during his interview.

Dennis, a baseball-bunting pig, waits throughout the show to shag some balls on 53rd Street. He ends up getting bumped after the ""Hedwig"" performance goes on too long.

During CBS Mailbag, Alan promotes ""Alan Kalter's Music To Make Love By,"" which includes two TV theme songs and a doorbell. Later, Steve Martin's lengthy absence from appearing on the show is explained in a little film called ""Dave and Steve's Gay Vacation.""

Dave experiments with how he can give the finger without being censored; Kelly Preston promotes ""Holy Man.""

Tony Mendez does a ""card trick""; Tito Puente contributes drumrolls to the Top Ten list; Dave shows a (bogus) new, improved $20 bill.

A new segment called ""This Day in Late Show History"" reveals that October 7 was a Saturday in 1994. Biff corrects Dave, telling him it was a Friday. Later, Jeff Goldblum promotes ""Holy Man.""

Dave takes a look at Tony's hands, which have marker ink all over them. Later, George Miller comments on the Clinton/Lewinsky scandal.

During CBS Mailbag, Tony bares his ass again, and The Foul-Mouthed Scenic Designer (Kathleen Ankers) lives up to her title.

The calvacade of mediocre crops continues as ""Joe Whitworth"" from Oregon walks onstage with a ""gigantic"" pumpkin; Biff presents a World Series Report despite a sore throat; Roberto Benigni plugs ""Life is Beautiful""; Mark McGwire does a little hitting practice on 53rd Street with Dave Dorsett's son Chris.

It's Dave's 3000th show in late night, so he celebrates by bringing Charles Grodin onstage to break the monotony of chatting with Paul. Later, Dave introduces some State Fair winners, including a 530-pound pumpkin and a middle-aged champion hog caller.

Dave and George Clarke go to Yankee Stadium, where the building engineer hits a home run.

Biff participates in more interviews in part two of his World Series report, while Danny Glover plugs ""Lethal Weapon 4.""

Tony's eye itches, and Dave gives him a hard time for potentially screwing up the cue cards; during CBS Mailbag, Dave interrogates TV star ""Calista Flockhart"" (Gerard), who magically transforms into the dancing baby from her hit show ""Ally McBeal""; Dave welcomes World Series hero David Wells.

Four shirtless guys (spelling ""YANKS"") bring out the Top Ten; Danny DeVito tries to sing.

Dave cons a Joe G's customer into appearing in a bogus campaign ad; Eddie Izzard does stand-up.

Biff shows outtakes from last week's World Series reports, while director Todd Solondz promotes ""Happiness.""

Dave makes several jokes at the expense of septuagenarian spaceman John Glenn; Holly Hunter plugs Living Out Loud.