Seasons & episodes

In a remote featuring Dave talking to various fan club presidents, a swordfight breaks out between the ""Cats"" and ""Star Wars"" fans. Also, Bob Borden professes his love to a disturbed Martha Stewart.

Dave ponders another one of his deep thoughts: ""How Long Can a Guy Spin a Revolving Door Before Somebody Stops Him?"" It takes 40 minutes and 6 seconds before security escorts the man out.

Throughout the night, Biff, Pat and Kenny recreate scenes from Academy Award-nominated films, including ""The English Patient"" and ""Jerry McGuire."" The gag comes to an abrupt end when, while attempting to spoof ""Secrets and Lies,"" they can't find anybody who saw the film.

Dave brags that he had an incredible Valentine's Day last year, until Paul persuades him to admit that he spent it watching TV with an amorous Leonard. Also, the Jazz Passengers (featuring Deborah Harry and Elvis Costello) perform ""Doncha Go 'Way Mad.""

Marv Albert is credited with six seperate appearances tonight, thus raising his total on the show to an even one hundred. Later, Sarah Ferguson, the Duchess of York, promotes her new cookbook.

Two weeks before, NBC denied Dave permission to use clips from his old show. So tonight, Tom Brokaw arrives and offers Dave a crumpled-up videotape from Late Night with David Letterman. Also, Dave shows a faux-documentary short called ""Dave's Family Weekend"" (with Andrea as his sister and Leonard as Mr. Rogers).

The outside cam goes to Joe G's to launch production of the quickie movie ""Space Volcano""; Bruce Willis murders Mujibur and Sirajul; Demi Moore shows up with 15 dogs as a gift for Dave, and later the mutts storm the control room.

Throughout the night, various civilians tell jokes about their jobs, while Dave admits that he has fallen in love with this year's Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue.

The latest edition of ""Leonard Tepper's Hidden Video"" takes place entirely at Hello Deli, while ""Cosby"" star Doug E. Doug does standup.

Frequent CBS Mailbag contributor Jerry Scales appears in the audience and is given a roast chicken made of Nyquil. Also, Tony Randall talks about becoming a parent for the first time.

On the three-year anniversary of his memorable first appearance on the Late Show, super-bowler Dick Weber rolls one strike after another out on 53rd Street. Later, he and Bill Cosby go one-on-one on the specially-built lane, with Weber decimating the sitcom star.

James Cotton sits in; while pedestrians footrace against each other over on 54th and Broadway.

Leonard Tepper is live at Madison Square Garden, annoying participants at this year's Grammy Awards. He closes the segment by calling Dave a jackass.

Dave shows outtakes of Leonard's Grammy report, and then gets thrown out of a taping of ""Wheel of Fortune"" by a security guard resembling Bill DeLace.

Trumpeter Al Chez sits in; the ""First Annual Biff Henderson Award"" goes to a much-serving Biff; Randy Newman and Lyle Lovett perform ""You've Got a Friend In Me.""

Dave comments on ""El Blizzardo Diablo,"" a raining snowstorm that practically has New York City in a standstill. Also, Dave and Paul participate in a cutthroat battle of putdowns towards each other.

Dave points out that the wet snow of yesterday's ""El Blizzardo Diablo"" has already melted and/or evaporated. Also, Adam Arkin promotes the upcoming made-for-TV movie Not In This Town.

During ""Rejected Commercial Characters,"" jokes are translated for a select audience onstage from English to Japanese.

Bluesman Keb' Mo sits in; Dave and Paul shill a new sleeping enhancer called EclipseQuil; ""pyrotechnic madman"" Ray Wold blows up stuff and somehow avoids burning himself.

CBS Mailbag: Jerry Scales asks, ""What do viewers miss?"" Gerard Mulligan comes out in costume as ""A 50-year-old guy dressed like Zorro."" Also, The Biff Henderson Players present ""Send in the Clones.""

Sean Pelton sits in for Anton, while Howard Stern promotes his new movie.

The camera fixates on a guy in the audience with a gigantic gut with DAVE written on it. Also, Martin Short does another musical number, with a final note so extended that he leaves the stage, goes to the bank, buys a sandwich at Hello Deli, picks up his dry cleaning, and returns to the theater just in time for the big climax.

The Late Show Current Events Singers take on Clinton's recent leg injury, then performs some sort of a cappella apology to Cindy Crawford.

Today's burning question: ""How Many Guys in Bunny Suits Can Get into a Coffee Shop?"" All 23 guys that volunteered get in, and they are later joined by a geeky audience member from Georgia, who is later carried back to the stage by the bunnies.